It’s 2AM. The bar is closed. The party is over. You’re on your way home when suddenly… you’re hungry.
Not just hungry either, but in a rare instance of alcohol-aided clarity and craving, you know exactly what you want.
You want something that so good because its bad. That instant gratification guilty pleasure kind of food, and makes feel dirty like you need to want to go to confession even if you aren’t Catholic.
Every town, village, or city I’ve ever been to has a place that offers this late night, post-party, go-to for soaking-up-the-extra food that you know you will regret before you’ve even bought it, but you don’t care. Because you got craving and because you gotta scratch that itch.
It is understood that some of these purveyors of pernicious provender are considerably better than others. Some are the stuff of late night legend upon which empires are built, and others tragic mistakes that inflict shame and pain such that the very name of this den of debauchery will forever after summon an involuntary gag.
In places like Los Angeles or New York, you will have so many tempting options that the devil himself might dally.
I’m from Los Angeles and for me that go-to is In-N-Out. Which is almost cheating because In-N-Out is all but an unimpeachable culinary rite for Southern Californians.
Recently though I found myself in New York, and walking back to my hotel at about 2AM those cravings inevitably hit and hard, and when they were surprising geographically localized.
You don’t get a burger, or a taco at 2AM in New York (you could, but don’t). No. In New York, you get a slice, and that slice comes from Joe’s Pizza.
There are without question better pies to be found in New York, and while Joe’s is good, you won’t find it on many “Best of…” lists, but for one that’s meets the crucial qualifications of not just better than decent but actually good, and at 2AM on a Wednesday…?
It’s Joe’s. And not just for me, judging by the line at 2AM, and long list of endorsements by celebrities and celebrity chefs.
I had been researching different pizzerias in New York, and although this one was a chain it was mentioned a couple of times. Never as the best, but always a solid standby. As it happened there was Joe’s 50 yards from my hotel on Fulton Street in the Financial District, and no matter what time I passed this place, it was always busy, particularly in the afternoon/early evening, and again late at night.
When you make your way to the counter, there will likely be anywhere from six to eight pies of various types from the menu on display in the case. Know what you want before you get there. When you order pretty much anything from a counter in New York, “They” (and by They I mean everybody no matter what side of the counter they are on) expect you to know what you want. Order, and then get out of the way. If you don’t know what you want, then why are you at the counter where people order? When there are 50 people in line behind, it’s not the time to ask questions about whether or not the ingredients are organic and responsibly sourced.
If you are from New York or are a frequent visitor, you know this… but if like me you are new to town or visiting (especially from LA) this can be a little different than what you are used to. Perhaps refreshingly so.
You pick your slice or slices, and then in literally just a couple of minutes it’s ready. Depending on what and much you order, it will come in a box on or a paper plate(s). While there is some standing counter space, there isn’t a lot of room and most that is taken up by the line, especially if the weather is less than ideal. This is a take away place, and the expectation is you get your food and go on your way.
While you can customize your orders for a whole pie, when ordering a slice its whatever is available behind the counter. I was telling a friend from home about Joe’ and they asked me, “How do you know its fresh and hasn’t just been sitting there?” Because of the high demand, and the number of people, those pies don’t have time to sit, and there were three to four guys in the back constantly making new ones. By the time the last slice of pie is gone, a new one is coming out of the oven.
They typically have two at a time of the more popular pies, and the turn over was impressive.
I ordered a slice of the Supreme – pepperoni, sweet Italian sausage, onion, and mushroom. They cut it popped it into the oven to toast it up a bit, and by the time I was done paying and putting my wallet away they were handing me my slice.
It was exactly the right temp. Hot and fresh without being burn-the-roof-of-your-mouth or tongue hot. The crust has both some crispness and chew, while still being foldable.
It was cheesy in a good way and not at all greasy, the toppings were perfectly cooked and had good flavor. Neither the mushrooms or onions looked wilted, burnt or overdone, and the sauce was flavorful without being too sweet, or two spicy.
It was delicious. Good by any standard, great for what you can get at 2 AM in New York to kill those cravings.
In fact imma go ahead and say that Joe’s is the In-N-Out of New York, which is high praise from a So Cal guy.
